No batteries needed.

No ignoring the member base like certain sites that start with a Y do on a constant basis...

No need for pillows on your trailer in the Outback.

No ooligans of any sort.

No weird ads saying, "if this banner is flashing, you've won a prize".

No shirt, no shoes, no problem.

No running with scissors.

No thinking in or out of the box, carton, crate or container...

No Whammys!

No sites named after actors from "Young Einstein."

No gratuitous use of exclamation marks!

No competition.

No free trips because I'm the 10,000th site visitor.

No web pages that won't let you leave, keep popping back when you try to "X" out.

No waiting.

No snail mail offers.

No way I'm going back to Yahoo!

No paradigm shifts.

No goofy guy singing the name of the site.

No wasted resources on pop-up killing programs.

No problem.

No selling my information.

No credit checks.

No pay-per-anything-usage.

No long load times.

No stalls or freezies.

No Easy Payments.

No money back guarantees.

No in between the lines.